When a soul mate hurts your feelings, it can come as a shock. The emotional pain that comes with it is extremely difficult to deal with. You probably believe your soul mate would be the last person on earth who would hurt you, but they do. It is not at all uncommon for soul mates to hurt each others feelings, especially when the time comes for one ,or both of them, to make the necessary changes.
For instance, let’s say the couple met when they were both in other relationships. Instead of waiting to begin a full fledged relationship until after they were both single, they started an affair. They both know that at some point the issue of terminating their previous relationship is going to come up. But they are not really thinking about that right now.
They want the payoff first, before they do the work, so they focus on the romance and how happy it is making them. That only lasts so long until the other relationships must be addressed. When soul mates can’t talk to one another as much as they want, and want the freedom to see one another when they want, struggles, arguments and frustrations come into play. One soul mate may have started the process of ending their relationship and can feel betrayed when the other has done nothing but make excuses. They fail to take responsiblity of their actions.
When that soul mate becomes single, they expect their soul mate to follow suit. But without a kick in the behind, they often don’t. The simple fact that a soul mate won’t leave their relationship to be with you, especially when you have done it for them, causes emotional instability. When you are sharing your soul mate with someone they don’t claim to love, you can feel like the second option. So the longer it takes for them to get out of their relationship, the longer a soul mate constantly gets their feelings hurt.
You may have been very compassionate regarding your soul mate’s situation. Now you feel as if you have been taken for granted because they don’t feel compassionate towards you. Why doesn’t your soul mate understand, or seem to care, you are experiencing an emotional roller coaster? Why wouldn’t your soul mate do whatever it takes to stop hurting your feelings? If you put your feelings last and their feelings first, it’s a safe bet they will put theirs first and yours last. They are just copying you. Until you put your own feelings first, they won’t either.
Start by looking at all you give your soul mate. Have you gone a bit overboard? (Soul mates have a tendency to do so.) Are you giving 100% while they are giving only about 40%? Well why are you still giving 100%? Because that is just how you are? Because you love them? Regardless of the excuse you are using, what you are doing is wrong.
You helped create a situation where you are giving too much and they are giving too little. Stop giving so much, so they can pick up the slack. If you don’t want them to take you for granted, pulling back is the best way to show them what they have been taking for granted. Showing them there are real consequences to their own happiness is a great lesson to teach someone when they hurt your feelings.
We also invite you to read our article: Soulmate Sabotage: Have They Been Hurt Before?